THE HOLIDAYS CAN BE GOOD FOR MENTAL HEALTH!

The holidays get a bad rap! Maybe, just maybe, the holiday season might be really good for mental health. The popular belief is that during this time of year suicide, anxiety, and the rates of depression just skyrocket. Not altogether true! As for suicide, the rates are highest in the spring. As far as depression and anxiety, yes, the reported rates have increased, but we need to ask ourselves WHY?

As a therapist, most of the anxiety and depression that a lot of people report at this time of year is very often due to not finding that perfect gift or being able to afford it.  They worry about creating the perfect holiday and then get depressed because that is simply impossible to do.  They worry about what others think of them if the gift doesn’t measure up. That type of situational anxiety and depression is just the inability to deal with self-inflicted stress because of society’s expectations. Those types of feelings are not about the meaning of Christmas and they disappear in January when the stress is off. 

Maybe the purpose of the holidays is to scream STOP and pay attention to what is important.  It is about the things we don’t pay much attention to throughout the year, like focusing on others and finding purpose in our existence.  It is not about scurrying around like a rat in a maze spending money in a misguided attempt to show love once a year.  Quite possibly, the difficulty that people have with the holidays is the realization that they should have been practicing their holiday spirit year-round!

The entire mental health industry uses techniques that mirror everything good about the season. We talk about gratitude and mindfulness. We urge clients to improve their human connection and to reach out to others.  We teach healing and moving forward.  We preach hope and attempt to empower an individual to recognize their worth. We recognize the importance of family and spiritual beliefs.  Sounds like a lot of the Christmas cards that we don’t get out until after New Year!

Instead of blaming the holidays for mental health issues, we should give them credit for helping people get into treatment. At this time of year, people reach out to each other and actually notice if the family or friend might be suffering. Many who enter treatment at this time of year often do so at the urging of a loved one or concerned friend.  People try to connect at Christmas and very often this might be enough to motivate a person to seek treatment.

There is no denying that the first Christmas after a loss may be particularly difficult.  I am old enough to have experienced the deaths of friends and loved ones.  I found myself at the saddest when the grief was all about unfinished business during the previous year.  It was all about the times that I should have visited instead of texting; the holding of a grudge and embracing anger instead of forgiveness.  It was far easier to deal with my sadness when I was able to reminisce about happy times. In the midst of repeating the fun stories, there were still tears, but they were tears of remembrance not of regret. 

So, maybe if we follow the true message of Christmas rather than the Gospel of Black Friday or Cyber Monday, the feelings of anxiety and depression would go down.  Just imagine embracing a Christmas season with gratitude, community, charity and a spirit of hope that one person can make a difference?  Those are things we can accomplish! Those are the things that make a positive difference in our mental health.

So, instead of looking at this time of year as a burden, maybe we should view it as an opportunity.  Stop blaming Christmas for our debt or using it as a definition of our political beliefs. It is an opportunity to celebrate that a baby born thousands of years ago into abject poverty, a sometimes-homeless immigrant who suffered discrimination and eventual death was able to change the world with a message of peace and love.  That message was not confined to one month, and neither should our Christmas spirit.

Christmas is a necessity. There has to be at least one day of the year to remind us that we’re here for something else besides ourselves.”
~ Eric Sevareid (1912-1992), American newscaster.

MERRY CHRISTMAS